Wedding is the best day in our life? It turns out not always. Many in this festive time is covered by a deep longing in which we do not dare to admit even ourselves. Where does depression come from after the wedding and how to avoid it?
Postpartum and postgraduate depression – phenomena of one order
Depression after the wedding is not as often as postpartum, but it is much wider than they think, and is much more common than they say about it. The marriage is a kind of finish, behind which an emotional decline awaits us, if life after the wedding did not live up to some of our expectations, the psychoanalyst Sophie Cadaline believes.
Post -breeding depression can occur when the wedding itself is perceived as the ultimate goal. The completion of unmarried or idle life, behind which will end with short affairs and past love stories.
As if the marriage guarantees that two people will now behave like adults, and their lives will always be stable and cloudless! If the fastening of the Union is considered a marriage seal, which brings the line of the entire previous life, then this is deadly for the future marriage.
In addition, often people are so focused on the ceremony that the meaning of the marriage, for which, in fact, the rite is carried out, retreats into the background.
In the middle of a magnificent, detailed holiday, one of the newlyweds suddenly feels that they forgot about him
The wedding is perceived as a historical event, but the question remains: what will follow it? Many couples outline the following logical stage – the birth of a child. This becomes a significant motivation for life together. However, often we are poorly listening to ourselves, to the partner, to what is happening around us, and we do not understand whether we are ready for the appearance of the child, whether we want him.
For many women, the birth of a child is an answer to the most important issues of being, incredible in strength experience of rebirth, asserting oneself in reality. Motherhood adds self -confidence, gives a new meaning of life. The same with marriage, I am sure Sophie cadaline.
Some people strive for him with all their might, unconsciously believing that with a new status they will gain a place in life, a new name, the meaning of existence, will become different. But marriage does not bring us revelations and does not help to affirm himself. Neither the child nor marriage solve in the principle of our problems. Doubts do not disappear, and the confidence that they love us does not become stronger. All the same needs to work, all the same things are waiting for us as before. However, this is for the best.
Signs of postgraduate depression
A person may have a feeling of some futility, emptiness. “And now? », » Why was it needed? ». The feeling appears that marriage is devoid of special meaning. It is important to emphasize once again, it reminds Sophie cadaline: the wedding itself does not radically change our life.
She will not put an end to anything and will not necessarily become the beginning of something new. She can become a delightful, beautiful and even magical moment of life, provided that we will be able to live like that. After all, very often the essence of the most beautiful things in the world is that they are fleeting, fleeting
Of course, the wedding is a landmark event and for everyone means something of its own, but then life continues, love continues, relations between partners.